I'm a Nut

I’m a little acorn round
Lying on the cold, hard ground
Everybody steps on me
That is why I’m cracked, you see.

I’m a nut, I’m a nut
I’m a nut, I’m a nut, I’m a nut

Called myself on the telephone
Just to see if I was home
Asked myself out on a date
Picked me up at half past eight

Took myself to a picture show
Sat me down in the very first row
Put my arms around my waist
Got so fresh I slapped my face

I’m so nutty, I don’t know
Why the squirrels love me so
I’m descended from an oak
Nuts to you, and that’s no joke